Imagine the sheer helplessness a parent may feel to see the short life of their child taken away in brief minutes. There wasn't a sign or a clue that today would be the last time a parent was graced with the essence, the innocence of their child. You think, "What could I have done to save my baby's life?" as you recall your last moment together. Was that last smile a silent cry for help? Was that last "I love you" a final good-bye? So many thoughts run through your mind; a thousand thoughts going miles a minute.
Continuing the daily rituals of your now-shattered life seem utterly impossible. Friends and family offer sympathetic support. Flowers, cards, grim smiles, a lingering pat on the shoulder. The anguish disappears for a slight second, but it returns almost immediately. There isn't one word that you could hear to take away the torment of losing your child. A child - your child, who depended on you for guidance, nurturing, love and protection. How could I have failed? You think you will never really live again.
The days, the months continue on. Not a day goes by without a thought of your child.
The realization has set in along with the knowledge that your child's spirit is still very much alive. You smile as you recall funny things your child did, grown-up comments your child made. You remember how very smart your baby was - the first steps, that first day of school. When everyone else has forgotten, the thoughts are still as vivid as ever.
But of course they would be. Hold fast to your memories, for they shall never die.
Tarra Lynne Wilkins