Two boys in Boston were playing baseball when one of them was attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy ripped a board off of a nearby fence, wedged it into the dog's collar and twisted it, breaking the dog's neck. A newspaper reporter from the Boston Herald witnessed the incident and rushed over to interview the boy. The reporter began entering data into his laptop, beginning with the headline: "Brave Young Red Sox Fan Saves Friend From Jaws Of Vicious Animal""But I'm not a Red Sox fan," the little hero interjected. "Sorry," replied the reporter. "But since we're in Boston, Mass, I just assumed you were." Hitting the delete key, the reporter began:"John Kerry Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Dog Attack""But I'm not a Kerry fan either," the boy responds. The reporter says, "I assumed everybody in this state was either for the Red Sox or Kerry or Kennedy. What team or person do you like? "I'm a Texas Ranger fan and I really like George W. Bush," the boy says. Hitting the delete key, the reporter begins again, "Arrogant Little Bush loving Hitlerite cowboy Kills Beloved Family Pet."
To the person who said that President Bush was one of the best presidents we've ever had, to me President Reagan was one of the best presidents we've ever had. Carter was the most honest president we've ever had. And if President Clinton hadn't got caught in that scandal with that intern, he would have been one of the smartest presidents we've ever had. At least he cared about the poor people. Bush Sr. was one of the biggest crooks we've ever had in the White House. And Bush Jr. is going to spend all our money on that war. We may be seeing the horse and buggy days before he leaves office.
As summer approaches and already observing the lack of dress attire in our church services, I spoke to men and women about this trend and our concern is that ministers say nothing from the pulpit pertaining to this lewd fashion and are allowing it by letting ones represent the church, or rather misrepresent their church, when at one time our youth could not wear shorts to church camp, but now can wear shorts, low rise jeans, halter tops, whatever in the main services. It's a church sanctuary, not a theme park or a bar. We must have the younger generation in church. My generation was during the anything goes, free love and drug days, but when we stepped inside a church, we knew we were in a holy place that did not compromise their standards for ours. Ministers, men, women, we need to begin teaching respect and modesty for God's house by being an example ourselves.
I read in your paper Monday about the accident with the Sikeston school bus and you reported that the brakes failed. The Highway Patrol inspected the bus Monday and said the brakes didn't fail. Also, I would like to know why you never report on the state inspections every year for the Highway Patrol on the Sikeston school buses. I've been informed that the mechanics for the Sikeston schools has excellent inspections. I think the public needs to knows this.
I was calling about the boys that was in the paper with the red Tahoe back in February. I just wanted them to know that we know your preliminary hearing is coming up and that we are all praying for them and we know that they are all good boys. We are going to be there for them and God is in charge. We're going to be there when all this goes down and we want to say that we love you.
This is to the party, the man and woman in Morehouse, that went into the yard and stole those wash tubs and ladder. I'm gonna give you one week to get them back out there in that yard, 'cause the neighbors saw you when you stole them. You ought to be ashamed of yourself because that man hadn't even been dead a week. His mother is still living and that is her property. The mayor and the sheriff are going to be notified of what you have done. There is a No Trespassing sign on the front of that house. Again, you have one week to get that stuff back over there in front of that house, or someone is gonna get you over it.