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Saturday, Aug. 27, 2016

Don't go dialing for my vote

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

I was at home for lunch, minding my own business, eating a meatball sub I might add, when the phone rang and rang and rang again. In the time it took me to eat my sandwiches, the phone rang five times.

Keep in mind these weren't phone calls from my wife asking me what we were going to do for dinner or a phone call from my parents seeing if I was still alive. No, they were calls from politicians and political groups. And these weren't the first I've gotten either.

Next to sports, politics is probably the thing I enjoy most. I like arguing issues and talking about who is going to win in what district and so on. But when you start calling me at home, especially when I'm eating, you are not winning any votes.

What makes me especially irate is that my phone number is on the state do-

not-call list. I don't want any kind of telemarketing phone call at any time, but there is a loop hole. Apparently Congress and most states have exempted political communications from the do-not-call lists.

Imagine that. The politicians, whose campaigns are the ones making the phone calls, actually excluded themselves from the do-not-call list. And people wonder why we common-folk hate politicians.

The thing that angers me the most though is that the politicians can't even take the time to make the phone calls themselves. Nope. Now they are all robo calls, a new marketing tool that gives campaigns a relatively cheap way to communicate with voters.

Only they aren't communicating with me. On the rare occasion that I will now answer the phone, if I hear an automated voice for Joe Highertaxes I hang up. And if I hear an automated voice wanting to inform me about the dangers of having a clone, I slam the phone down.

Because that is about the only way you can counter the robo calls and Jane Liarliarpantsonfire politician knows this.

But I have an idea. Granted it is a little juvenile but then again look who's writing this.

First, I need to make a recording of my own. It might go something like: "I'm a voter and one that doesn't like to be bothered by your intrusive phone calls. If I want to know your stand on an issue I will read the Standard Democrat or read one of your thousand pamphlets you will inevitably stick in my front door. Because you called me at home I now want you to know that you will no longer get my vote and I really wanted you to win because I hate the other guy."

Part two of my stupid plan will be to call the campaign office of Mr. Annoying Politician (since they never list their home numbers) and play the recording. Obviously the person answering the phone will hang up, but I will keep calling until I have played the entire message. We'll see how they like that.

Or maybe I'll just not vote for the candidate or the issue who tries to call. Nah, it sounds too easy to me and there might not be anyone left to vote for.

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